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Friend, can we talk about Christmas overwhelm for a second?
I’m a HUGE proponent of simple and joyful family life. And honestly? The holiday online content is SO OVERWHELMING THESE DAYS. Every time I scroll Instagram in December, I see these elaborate elf scenes, Pinterest-perfect cookie exchanges, advent calendars that look like they cost more than my grocery budget… and I just want to close my phone and hide under a blanket.
So here’s what I would encourage you to do instead: Pick a few traditions and just do those consistently. That’s it. That’s the whole strategy.
Over time, some may get replaced with new ones. Or as your kids get older, you may feel like you have more capacity to add something. But if you do too many things, they all become sort of meaningless and Mom just feels stressed. (Been there. Done that. Got the frazzled mom t-shirt.)
A Little Pep Talk for Moms of Littles
I DO want to CHEER ON YOU MOMS OF TODDLERS AND LITTLES though – start the meaningful traditions now!! Even when it seems like the kids don’t get it and don’t care. Even when your two-year-old is more interested in eating the ornaments than hanging them. Even when nobody sits still for the Christmas story and someone spills hot chocolate on the couch.
Keep going.
One year, they’ll suddenly care and say, “Awe I remember this from last year.” And then it’s just the sweetest thing ever. I promise.
I remember the first time my oldest (who’s almost 12 now!) said she remembered our pajama tradition from when she was little. She was maybe 5 or 6, and she got SO EXCITED about getting new Christmas jammies because she remembered doing it “last time.” My heart just about burst.
Why I’m Not Sharing “100 Fun Tradition Ideas”
Rather than share “100 fun tradition ideas” or some giant overwhelming list, I’ve decided to just share the ones my big kids actually love and care about. These are the traditions that have STUCK in our house – the ones the kids ask about every single year, the ones they’d be devastated if we skipped.
When they were all really little, I did this simple toddler advent activities calendar which has tons of ideas for super simple free and cute toddler stuff at home. We had a blast with it when everyone was tiny!
We’ve mostly shifted into big kid mode (even though we have a toddler again – life is funny that way!) and so the activities calendar got dropped in favor of the 8 things listed below.
My kids, as of this writing, are 12 (almost), 10, 8, 6, and 2!
Our Older Four Kids’ Favorite Christmas Traditions in Our Home Are:
I’ve put them in a list in order of when we added them to our family… so, when the kids were itty bitty, we only did the first 3 things. As they got older and I had a little more capacity (and wasn’t drowning in diapers and sippy cups), we added more.
1. Christmas Jammies & Lights
We exchange new pajamas (or comfy clothes/ hoodies/ sweats/ robes – whatever sounds cozy), wear them to get donuts at a favorite local 24/7 donut shop, and drive around to look at lights.
This tradition started when my oldest was just a baby. We’d bundle everyone up in their new PJs, pile into the car with hot chocolate (which inevitably got spilled), and just drive around looking at neighborhood lights. The kids LOVED it. Still do.
Now that they’re older, the donut shop stop is the highlight. There’s something magical about wearing pajamas in public – the kids think it’s hilarious every single year. And honestly? So do I.
2. Advent Jesus Storybook Ornaments
We read one story per day from the Jesus Storybook Bible, and hanging the ornament is a highlight for sure. I have an old handmade set that my mom made for us years ago. Every year, at least one ornament breaks and we either skip that story because we’re behind 😂 or a big kid makes a replacement.
(Last year we were missing the baby Jesus ornament on Christmas Eve. A BIG PROBLEM. My 10-year-old saved the day by drawing one on cardstock and cutting it out. It was… not beautiful. But it worked!)
There is a cute ornament set on Amazon that isn’t crazy expensive and perfectly coordinates with the Jesus Storybook Bible readings. If you’re starting this tradition from scratch, I’d totally recommend grabbing that set!
Here is my longer post about this tradition.
This is hands-down one of my favorite traditions. It keeps the focus on Jesus throughout December, and the kids genuinely look forward to the story and ornament each night. (Well, most nights. Some nights we’re scrambling to catch up because life happened. But that’s okay!)
3. Christmas Picture Books
I’ve added to our collection over the years and we read one most evenings. I just keep them in a basket near the fireplace so they’re easy to grab.
Last year, I took a picture of each kid with their favorite book. (Our newest little family member is in the process of being adopted, so we have yet to figure out his favorite Christmas book. TBD.)
This was a terrible quality picture snapped in the dark, but these are all the Christmas picture books we’ve collected over the years. I just buy 2-3 books per year and often get others from the library. 2-3 books a year for 10 years adds up!! We have a pretty solid collection now, and I love that some of these books were MY favorites as a kid.
My 2 favorites that didn’t make the kids’ faves are:
- The Gift of the Magi (this edition – it’s beautifully illustrated!)
- Mr. Willowby’s Christmas Tree (this one is just DELIGHTFUL and the kids groan when I read it but secretly love it)
We also love this Christmas I Spy Book and this Mother Goose Christmas Carol Book (only available used, but SO worth hunting down!). Both are enjoyed DAILY in December every single year!! The I Spy book especially gets dragged all over the house.
4. Christmas Movies
Our grade school aged kids’ favorite Christmas Movies are The Star, Elf, Home Alone, the 2018 Grinch, and unfortunately, The Christmas Chronicles. Ha!
(I say unfortunately because The Christmas Chronicles is… not my favorite. But the kids think it’s hilarious, so we watch it every year and I just smile and nod.)
I grew up watching It’s a Wonderful Life with my family and have invited the kids to watch it with me if they want. The older ones are starting to really enjoy it, which makes my nostalgic heart SO happy.
I have a feeling The Best Christmas Pageant Ever will be a new favorite as well. We saw it in theaters this year and the kids are already asking to watch it again!
5. Jalabokaflod
Okay, so this is an Icelandic tradition we learned about from this podcast episode. Basically, you give books on Christmas Eve, then spend the evening reading together with cozy treats. I buy each person a few books, and we sit around reading for a while together, eating treats. Candles lit, table decorated, fire roaring. The Christmas Hygge vibes are STRONG.
Let me tell you how this tradition has evolved in our house…
The first year we did it, the kids were 4-9 and they read for about 10 minutes. I read picture books to the 4 and 6 year old the whole time. Someone cried. And we ended up doing a puzzle and having everyone in bed by 7:15. I remember thinking, “Well, that was a disaster. We’re never doing that again.”
Year 2, kids ages 5-10, people looked forward to opening books (they had fond memories from the previous year – HOW?!), read for about 30 minutes and I think someone got sent to their room. Progress!
This year (year 3), my now 10 year old said, “Mom, do you know what my favorite thing in all of December is?!” (I did not.) “Jalabokaflod!!! I can’t wait to get a new book and have a cozy night reading by the fire.”
Friend. My bookish homeschooling mom heart MELTED.
It’s a keeper!
If you have young kids who are just learning to read, here are all of our favorite beginning reader books (over on my homeschooling site). Any of these would be great gifts!
6. Gingerbread Houses with Friends
As much as my heart melted when my 10 year old made the above comment about reading night being her favorite, I have to admit, I’m pretty sure this one tops most of the kids’ favorite activities lists.
It is a newer add-on that we’ve started as the kids have gotten older.
This is a hold-over from one of my BEST childhood memories. Every year, our good family friends would host this big gingerbread house making night. We’d spend HOURS building these elaborate creations. By age 14, we were making sky scrapers and modern Frank Lloyd Wright style homes, I kid you not. It was the highlight of my December every single year growing up.
So when my kids got old enough, I knew I wanted to recreate that magic for them.
The graham cracker gingerbread house setup is pictured below. Everyone gets cardboard wrapped in foil for their base/ foundation. I buy tons of name-brand Graham Crackers (they hold up SO much better than cheap ones – trust me on this), tons of frosting cans, tons of candy, and cut lots of little index card pieces.
The kids use frosting and folded index cards in corners and come up with the craziest creations. Last year someone built a three-story mansion. Another kid made a “swimming pool” out of blue frosting. It’s chaos and sugar and JOY.
We invite a couple other families over, set everything up on a big table covered in plastic tablecloths (learned that one the hard way), and just let the kids GO WILD. The adults hang out, drink coffee, and supervise the sugar madness.
Fair warning: the aftermath is… intense. There’s frosting on the ceiling somehow. Candy on the floor. Sticky fingerprints everywhere. But it’s SO worth it.
7. Sibling and Cousin Secret Santa
Each of my kids works (mostly chores) to earn money to spend on gifts. We have an ongoing chores-for-money system but they also sometimes do extra chores around this time of year to earn gift money.
They each take great care picking out a gift for a sibling and a gift for a cousin, both secret santa style. It is SO FUN to watch them get excited about giving. They put so much thought into what their person would like!
A few years ago, we felt the gift craziness really amplify with having a big family and the kids all wanting to (sweetly) also make gifts for everyone. When my oldest was 8, all 8 cousins tried to give something to each other. And all my 4 kids tried to give something each to each other.
The gifts that year were SO overwhelming. So many dollar store gifts wrapped with SO much tape. LOL. It took us like two hours to open everything and by the end, nobody even remembered what they got. It was just too much.
So we moved to a Secret Santa tradition and the kids enjoy this more!! This was all about SIMPLIFYING the quantity of gifts given and directing our energies beyond buying, wrapping, and exchanging as much stuff as possible. That is a win to me!!
Now they focus on ONE really thoughtful gift instead of a bunch of little things. And honestly? The quality of the gifts has gone way up. Last year my 8-year-old saved up and bought her cousin (who LOVES unicorns) this beautiful stuffed unicorn that she’d been eyeing for months. It was so sweet.
8. Sardines on Christmas Night with Entire Extended Family
Oh my goodness, this one is THE BEST.
My kids start asking about this at the beginning of the month. On Christmas night we gather with my husband’s side of the family – he has 3 siblings. There are currently a total of 9 grandkids (almost 10!) and 9 adults.
After dark, we turn off all the lights at Grammy and Papa’s house to play Sardines. Everyone partners up on an adult/ kid team. One team is “it.” Everyone except the “it” team goes into the garage to wait with a 2 minute timer. The “it” team hides somewhere in the house. At the 2 minute mark, everyone starts looking for the “it” team.
When you find the hiding team, you squeeze in with them (hence “sardines”). The last team to find everyone loses! It’s hide-and-seek in reverse and it’s HILARIOUS.
Last year, Grammy and my 6-year-old hid in a closet and SEVEN PEOPLE eventually squeezed in there trying to be quiet. Someone started giggling and gave away the whole thing. It’s one of my favorite Christmas memories ever.
That’s It!
We don’t do Elf on the Shelf or a giant baking day or attend a bunch of Christmas musicals/ shows/ productions, etc. We do bake a little throughout (my older girls love to bake on their own anyway), and I make a couple traditional family recipes around Christmas Eve and Christmas, but it doesn’t feel excessive.
You can’t do it all!! And you shouldn’t try.
Here’s Why It Didn’t Feel Too Crazy to Add Things as They Got Older
We made some swaps… We swapped out our toddler and preschool advent activity calendar for a couple other bigger one-day traditions like Jalabokaflod and Gingerbread Houses. We choose not to attend a bunch of big productions or anything, in favor of more time at home.
We cut down on gift buying a little… As we had the means, we traded out activities instead of material gifts, which is usually more expensive but less time-consuming. So, for example, my husband and I take both sets of parents out for a nice dinner sometime in January. We gift this for Christmas and that is four fewer gifts to buy. All of them feel like they don’t need anything and the time is more fun. With a big family, it’s hard to get quality time like that with our own parents, so that’s a simple swap if you can swing it and it makes sense with your family personalities.
I got more efficient with shopping… I try to plan most Christmas shopping in early November so I can order most online over Black Friday. I also end up hitting a few local stores, but we don’t spend a ton of time in stores shopping this time of year. (Because have you tried to take 5 kids Christmas shopping? No thank you.)
And honestly? As I wasn’t nursing and diapering and potty training anyone anymore, I had more energy for some of the extra fun stuff. If you’re in that season with a little one, cut yourself some slack and drop a couple activities. You can always pick them back up next year.
You Don’t Need…
I would encourage you time and again to pick the traditions that work for YOU and turn off the social media FOMO this time of year.
You don’t need that viral tree or wreath. You don’t need to buy $1000 worth of gifts for each person. You don’t need to hide an elf in some extravagant tiny mess every day (unless that brings you joy, then have at it).
Seek peace. Celebrate Jesus. Create and wonder at the anticipation of the Messiah. And spend time together.
That’s what it’s all about, friend.
We’re mostly home, cozied up together, opening our door and inviting others in, pursuing simple + connected + meaningful traditions. And you know what? The kids are happy. They feel loved. They know what Christmas is really about. That’s all that matters.
Merry Christmas, friends.
xoxo,
~ Renee
(Pictured below is this ridiculous Christmas sweater and taxidermy thing our church does on JOY Sunday of Advent… lol)